Fashion & Flat Whites: CT
How has your style defined you?
I used to take myself too “seriously” because I grew up the Odd One Out (undiagnosed ADHD). Now I love and embrace my weirdness and I love to show that in my style!
Who would you say your style icon is?
As a kid, Jessica Rabbit. Now, Hello Kitty. Lydia Deets. Betty Boop. Wednesday Addams. Morticia Addams. Aaaand still Jessica Rabbit.
How long have you been interested in fashion, and what inspired your interest?
Oh, I think always, in a way. I played a significant amount of Dress Up as a kid and then I was in theatre for 8 years of my life. I used to borrow wigs, gowns, and costume jewelry from the older women at the theatre and play with them in the dressing room. One of my favorite early memories was watching a woman who was like a big sister to me put on her stage makeup and transform from a pretty girl to a Goddess.
In high school, people called me a Goth for my love of black eyeliner, dark lipsticks, and giant platforms. I didn’t even know there was a word for it until then! Hot Topic became my home away from home and I still love to raid their sale section to this day
Can you tell us about your journey to body confidence?
It has been a long one and - I’m not ashamed to say - ongoing.
Trigger Warning (TW) - eating disordered talk/behaviors
I went through a very developmentally normal “chubby” phase around age 10 or 11 and that may not have affected me as much if I hadn’t also been in a small Arts school/theatre that was run by a verbally sadistic duo. The woman would tell girls (starting from about age 9) that we were “too fat” for her stage or make big declarations about how she couldn’t put us onstage if “some of you girls don’t start losing some weight.” I was a scholarship student so I had no power to talk back and I was too young to recognize how dangerous this messaging would become.
By age 14 or so I was deeply unhappy with my body and how I looked. A new Ballet teacher taught me about restricting and I started over-exercising to the point of exhaustion. I also experimented with diet pills. When I dropped down to extremely slender for my body type (you could see my collarbones and ribs) I was rewarded with praise. But it was also the early 00’s so I was still unhappy with myself because I had thick thighs and a large, round bum. I would have been called “slim-thicc” in modern parlance but that body type was only allowed in those days if you were J-Lo.
Once I got to college and started taking my mental health more seriously (got on medication and some therapy), I got back up to a healthier body size and improved my relationship with food. That was far from the end, however. For at least the next decade, I would go through bouts of crash diets, brutally punishing my body with exercise, agonizing over every inch or ounce.
It wasn’t actually until very recently that I finally stopped counting calories completely and started ignoring the scale. Ironically, it was the biggest weight gain of my life that led to this change!
I started suddenly gaining weight and losing energy in late 2019. I went to the MD and every test said I was fine - but I never felt “fine.” Then Covid hit.
In quarantine, I decided to get back into one of the things I’d always loved - makeup and Alternative Fashion. I’d started an IG for improving my makeup skills but was lackadaisical about updating. With nothing but time on my hands, IG became a way to express my creativity. As I looked for people to follow, I found the Body Positive and Body Acceptance communities.
I definitely think those influencers were lifesavers. For the first time EVER, I saw chubby bodies being beautiful, being loved and displayed and decorated - even admired! I saw big, thick, lumpy legs with thighs full of cellulite on full display. Legs just like mine had always been, ever at my lowest weight.
I wanted to be the kind of person who could show her body - this “new” body (since I was now at my highest weight ever by 30+ lbs) - such love and respect. I wanted to wear things I had denied myself even back when I did fit a more “conventional” standard.
I can’t say that I feel amazing every day, or even every moment. I will say that decorating the body I have rather than fantasizing about what it once was or what I think it “should” be has been revelatory. It’s a practice of love and of patience. Of devotion to my art, with my body as the centerpiece.
What is your profession, and how does what you wear impact your profession?
I work in mental health now. A big part of my journey was Grad school. An even bigger part was just getting older and realizing I didn’t have to “dim my shine” to be taken seriously.
I dressed down a lot in the earlier years because I thought that was the only way to be professional.
Today, I show up covered in rainbows, fluffy sweaters, and glittery moto boots. And no one bats an eye because I’ve proven myself to be competent in my field. It’s a wonderful feeling. I’ve seen people kind of perk up at the sight of my pink hair or my funky earrings. I think they appreciate the authenticity and the “quirky” vibe.
How did you find out about Mys Tyler?
I believe I saw a link from another Alt Fashion influencer and I thought it looked fun!
Have you enjoyed being a Contributor of Mys Tyler inspiring women?
Absolutely! I love a platform focused around Fem fashion and shopping! People who tag brands on their social media are already the best and on Mys Tyler there’s even a link!!
How has using Mys Tyler impacted you?
So far, I have been mostly focusing on building my outfits as completely as possible. Some things are hard to find links for because I thrift a lot, lol. I want to delve more into finding Community. There have to be more Alternative, pastel loving, dopamine dressers like me on there!
What's the perfect formula for a feel-good outfit?
Ooh, it depends on the context but I’d say color coordination and just the right amount of accessorizing. I’ve also recently been expanding my purse collection to include more adorable plush backpacks and themed elements.
What's one fashion hack you love?
Looking for balance. Step back and take in the whole look - if it feels lopsided, you’re not finished.
What do you hope the future of fashion will look like?
Inclusive!! I keep hearing that “thin is back in” and it curdles my insides to consider. Nothing wrong with natural thinness, but when it’s held as the only beauty standard or pushed to the extreme (as most things in fashion tend to be) it’s incredibly harmful.
Body diversity is essential, I think, for everyone’s well being. We are so deeply affected by the things we see every single day.
I wish we could demolish all the face and body altering filters, throw out photoshop, and just see one another as real people! Not to mention that uniformity is so bland and tiresome…
Anything else you’d like to share?
How much time ya’ got? Kidding. Mostly.
Hit me up any time to talk about neurodivergence in AFAB people, collecting Vintage toys/plushies, or Buffy the Vampire Slayer
CT is one of Mys Tyler’s Contributors, inspiring women across the world with her alternative style. You can follow CT on Mys Tyler to be inspired below!
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