Fashion & Flat Whites: Fran Arcuri
Fran rocking a gorgeous, bright colored dress with some beautiful, bright accessories!
How would you describe your style?
I like to describe my style as classic, but with a twist. I’m all for a classic aesthetic; I like shapes and styles that are flattering and timeless, but I add the twist. My twist is typically color, but also bold prints, little bit of sparkle, and print mixing. Adding a point of interest is the twist that I go for to keep it fun, to keep it exciting. That’s how I roll both inside and outside of work.
How long have you been interested in fashion?
It’s always been innate ever since I was a little girl. I remember I’d be out at the shops with Mum and I’d always gravitate towards the shoes, I’ve got a thing about shoes!, or the pretty dresses. I think it was always something that just came from within, it’s not something that I found later.
I remember my mum was a bit of an influence. I’m of Italian background, and everytime I’d be trying something on in a change room, if I had dark colors on she would say in Italian “Sono coloro morti! They’re dead colors if they’re dark!’ And so, she was always encouraging me to wear bright colors because in her mind, they represented life and that lifting of moods. So I was exposed to that from a young age and I guess it resonated because I loved choosing those colorful options with Mum’s guidance and inspiration. I think it just evolved.
As I grew up and became an adult, I always erred on the side of color, although I think it’s probably as I’ve started my Instagram that the interest really took off. I think with age, you get more comfortable in your skin as well, and so you care less about what people think. And so, that plus the platform that was Instagram gave me that confidence to make bolder choices, to perhaps mix prints or clash prints in a way that I might not have done before. I’m of course influenced by the amazing fashionistas around me, and so we kind of egg each other on so to speak in a really positive and uplifting way as well.
What is your profession, and how does what you wear impact your profession?
I’m a perinatal psychiatrist so I specialize in pre-conception, pregnancy, and postpartum. A large portion of my patients are women, although I do occasionally see men because that period of life affects men as well. I love what I do and I must admit as much as I love fashion, my primary passion lies in my work. I love it because women get better with the right intervention. I work in private practice and I also run the clinic that I work at. For me, fashion choices for work have to be professional, but I guess that’s where my classic with a twist comes into it. Classic, in my mind, epitomizes that professional approach to fashion, but why make it boring?
Because of the line of work I do, I think if I’m wearing a bit of color that it might even help engagement, because it’s a nice icebreaker in the session. Somebody might comment on my shoes, or the color, or we start talking about just generally fashion and they’ll tell me about a label they love, so it’s kind of powerful in the sense that I feel confident in my role and in what I do.
I always say to my patients I like to practice what I preach, so I am a big advocate of encouraging women to practice self-care. In the work I do, maternal guilt features a lot. I don’t know that we ever get rid of it completely, but I think we can counter maternal guilt by making space for ourselves and looking after ourselves. And for me, I channel that in my fashion blogging, in wearing clothes that I love. Not everybody will go for fashion as their choice of self-care, but I think that’s a bit of me modeling that I do that self-care in that way.
So many women will struggle, especially when they’ve had a baby, with body confidence, and so I’ll encourage them to look after themselves by going out and buying lipstick, it doesn’t have to be expensive, or a piece of jewelry, or a scarf, or something that makes them feel good.
If there’s a woman reading this who is struggling, is there anything you’d want to say to her?
We all struggle. I think we’ve all had our moments in life. I say it’s the modern epidemic: we’re all perfectionists, we have high standards and expectations of ourselves and we all love a bit of control and order. The optional extra, I always say, is the need to please and be approved of. And, it’s those qualities that are clearly functional qualities that get us achieving and doing things. But I also think that when we’re really rigid about perfection and high standards, and when we translate that into how we look, or how our body looks, I think it can be a real trap.
It’s all about also practicing a degree of flexibility with that thinking and being kind to ourselves. Practicing a bit of self compassion and kindness, and looking at our strengths, not focusing on what doesn’t look good in our minds. So rather than focusing on negatives, focusing on what we love about ourselves and use that to our advantage, particularly when it comes to what we wear or the choices we make in life. Because you know what? Perfection doesn’t exist. We’re never gonna look perfect. We all come in different shapes and sizes and I think perfection is in the eye of the beholder at the end of the day. There is no one ideal. We’re all beautiful and I think it’s a real liberation when we get to that in our mind. It can be a tough gig and there’s some days that are harder than others where we’re not feeling it, so I think it’s always a work in progress, but so liberating if we can harness it.
Absolutely! And bodies change over time, which you know especially in working with pregnant and postpartum women.
Bodies never really go back to what they were, they evolve and change at different stages of life with whatever we’re going through. The pandemic was a really good example of that! We were stuck at home. The opportunities to get exercise or stay active diminished. Life will throw us circumstances that impact us: we might go through illnesses or certainly having a baby will do it, in terms of changes.
I’ve got some women who hang onto the smaller sizes of clothing that they might have worn 15 years ago because they have in their mind, ‘I’ll lose the weight and get back to that,” and so they’ll deprive themselves from buying anything new! And therefore, they don’t love what they’re wearing now, and that only contributes to an enduring negative mindset, which is awful! It’s a travesty! Maybe it’s symbolic to, and I’m not saying get rid or burn those clothes, although part of me wants to, put them away, put them out of sight. Pack them up. Put them in storage. Give them to charity if you’re inclined. But, put them away and honor who you are now and what you look like now.
Go buy something that makes you feel good in the now and pop that in your wardrobe and visually look at that to see that you’ve got choices that fit you and make you feel good now. And if down the track your body changes again and you want to pull out the old clothes, get ‘em out.
You deserve to honor yourself now and be in the moment. Our sense of what is ideal evolves and changes over time too! It’s really important to try not to give it mileage in our minds and fuel it, and instead redirect it and channel it for good.
Fran looking so fabulous in this gorgeous pink floral blouse paired with this stunning white skirt. Can’t forget the pink heels, either!
Can you tell us about your journey to body confidence?
As we get older, and maybe not for everyone, but certainly for me, I know myself more. I feel more confident in myself and I’ve realized it’s so exhausting to stress about how we look and what we don’t like. We always focus on what we don’t like about ourselves. ‘I wish I was taller, I wish I had a bigger bust, I wish…,’ but you know what? This is my body, and my body’s achieved a lot in the time that I’ve been living, and I’m gonna tune into my strengths with my body and fly the flag for the little people out there. For me, it’s been a journey of self acceptance and liberation.
Liberation of all those that I thought were ideals, because what’s ideal in our society doesn’t necessarily match up to me. I’m never gonna be glamazonian or tall, that’s just not going to happen. It’s about acceptance, and that’s easier when we focus on the positives and what we like about ourselves.
I know for some women that’s a struggle to find something that they like, but that’s where we start. We have to focus on what it is about ourselves and play to those strengths, and that’s what I’ve done over time. As you get older, you get wiser, and it’s liberating to let go of that stuff, and you preserve so much more energy, too!
“Honor who you are now and what you look like now. Go buy something that makes you feel good in the now and pop that in your wardrobe and visually look at that to see that you’ve got choices that fit you and make you feel good now.”
How did you find out about Mys Tyler?
Mys Tyler got in touch with me on Instagram. The Mys Tyler team shot a message through when it was being set up here in Australia. I remember joining as a Founding Member, literally the day before the deadline for the Founding Contributor status. I liked the philosophy. I was initially wondering ‘What is this?,’ and over time I’m obviously much more aware of what it represents and I think it’s brilliant. It’s brilliant to have representation across all body shapes, sizes, heights, cultures, skin color. Brilliant. Because that is reality. And that is what should define ideal and beauty, is the diversity, and that’s what Mys Tyler represents. I’m pleased to have joined when I did.
How has using Mys Tyler impacted you?
It’s been great to connect with other women across the world. I enjoy seeing how women style different outfits and get inspiration of the use of colors, patterns, how some women might style a certain dress style, whatever! I love that I can channel it from the perspective of women of similar shapes and sizes to me, but also generally from all the marvelous fashionistas out there that are doing their thing.
What's the perfect formula for a feel-good outfit?
My perfect formula is that it's gotta have color. I don’t think I could ever do just black ever again! For me, it’s really about color, and I think maybe at time prints, having that point of twist always in the background of the classic aesthetic. Accessorizing is part of it, too. Because sometimes you can have a dress that can be beautiful, but then the accessories can really elevate it. It’s almost like a creative outlet in that sense, putting things together. The perfect outfit for me is also the outfit that I have had fun styling as well.
Fran embracing vibrant retro vibes in this bright and beautiful jumpsuit.
What do you hope the future of fashion will look like?
I think we’re slowly getting there. When I was growing up, there was a very standard type of message that was being delivered where fashion was all about the models that were a certain shape and size, whereas now I think we’re seeing much more diversity out there. It’s still got a long way to go.
Personally, from my perspective - and this is something I feel very strongly about - I find that I can be a bit nervous of flagging this sometimes, because a lot of people think that because I’m small, that it’s easy [to find clothes that fit], but it’s actually not. I struggle, like a lot of women on the other end of the sizing spectrum, whereby when we talk about size inclusivity, there’s still many labels, certainly here in Australia, that don’t do a size 6. An Australian size 6 is a bit like a US 0 I think, and even with the variations in sizing, sometimes the size 6s that do exist are too big. So I’m often needing to get clothes altered, or I just don’t buy them. It either costs me more, or I go without, and that’s always sad, especially if I like something. And I know women at the other end of the sizing spectrum will often go without, and that’s sad!
I’ve often felt, though, very apprehensive of conveying that struggle because a lot of people assume that ‘oh well you’re small, so you’re fine,’ but it’s actually not fine. And labels that say they are size inclusive when they don’t do a 6 or they don’t do a 24, it’s not size inclusive, and so I would hope that as we move forward, we see more of that size inclusiveness emerge. So we’re seeing models of different sizes modeling garments and clothing these days, which is wonderful! I know it’s not that simple and it can cost more to expand sizing, but I’m not the only person this size. There’s got to be a market surely! I would love that, because there’s so many times that I’ve felt devastated that I can’t wear something. I’d like to see that size inclusivity becomes standard so no woman misses out.
If you could tell your younger self anything, what would you tell her?
Just keep doing you, and don’t invest too much in what other people think. Be true to yourself and don’t sweat the small stuff. Don’t get fixated on things you can’t readily change, focus on what you can control. When it comes to size, you focus on your strengths and what makes you feel good and hone in on that. I’ve got a saying, “Life’s too short. Buy the dress. Buy the shoes.” So many women deprive themselves. As I’ve gotten older, I’m less inclined to deprive myself. That was a learning curve. I’d tell my younger self not to get stressed about that sort of thing and be kind to yourself.
Fran is one of Mys Tyler’s Contributors, inspiring women across the world with her classic and colorful fashion. You can follow Fran on Mys Tyler to be inspired below!
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